From My End Times Dictionary

From "Doom"

Doom is the law book of King Alfred the Great, circa 900 CE.  This book is so awesome that the Ten Commandments are the preface.  That would be my blurb for it: "this book is so awesome that...." Doom means something like “law” or “judgment” to King Alfred because language evolves over time.  Wikipedia provides the example “Doom very evenly!  Do not doom one doom to the rich and another to the poor!”  King Alfred rated honesty pretty highly: “if he belie himself and be slain, let him lie uncompensated,” and it’s ironic that I get a very doomy image from that of a big red-bearded Viking guy lying in the mud, bleeding out from a sword wound, blinking his last blinks knowing that no one has prayed for him in the way you need to be prayed for if you’re going to heaven.  And the camera pans out up into the sky and into our solar system and our galaxy and our universe, but the heavy string music continues over top of all of it because my capacity for imagining stuff is afflicted with the sappy conventions of my time (as if Viking heaven required beseeching prayer—I’m pretty sure Vikings just attacked and took over their heaven, which wasn’t even called heaven—it was called V-something—Valhalla—yes) which I cling to as if they had a merit I would someday defend to an Art Critic God.  “Those were great accomplishments,” I’d say to this God.  “You have to concede the skill and dedication to craft.  Some of those viola runs are incredibly technical.” 

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